Wednesday, April 23, 2008

It's like when two planets collide....


First let me say that I feel guilty about this post(complaining and all), I know how many of you out there have been waiting forever to bring your daughter home and how agonizing the wait is.
I want to also add that I love my Jillian beyond the sun, moon and stars.


Lately this little monkey and I are like two planets colliding at high speed. Jilly bean has been challenging me(more than usual), throwing tantrums that are going on for what seems like hours, making me so stressed that I have sat and cried myself silly.
Now I have given much thought to why her behaviour has escalated so much lately, I have come up with a couple of things.
First I know that my life in the last couple of weeks has been a little stressed and I think she has picked up on that, I have not been as patient, not been my usual self.
Second she is testing me to the limits, now she has always been one to throw tantrums when things don't go her way but wow, she is going for complete control of the castle.
Now being the Queen as I am, letting go of some of the control has been an issue for me, heaven knows I am trying to bend a little, LOL.
Lately I feel like I have been smashing my head against a brick wall, Superman says that I need to take a break, go do something on my own, as he is running out the door to go and do something??
Jillian has also decided that she only wants to listen or do things for Superman, now I am a big girl and I know I shouldn't take this personally but "ouch".
Wow, I just unloaded a lot here, sorry if I sound like a big whiner or complainer, LOL. It feels good to let this go, start the day anew, go from here.










19 comments:

Vivian M said...

We are dealing with that right now too. Kerri is testing limits, and is now doing the opposite: everything is Mommy and Daddy is the bad guy (used to be the other way around).
The tantrums may be for attention. But I think it's just their age, and they are seeing how far they can go and testing us.
I think you should let Jilly and Superman spend some quality time together and you should take his advice and run out the door like he does. Run straight for Tim Hortons!

mommy24treasures said...

you are not a complainer! You are sorting out your feelings and it helps to make sense to yourself when you do that. I do think they seem to know when we are stressed just as you said, that probably does have some to do with it.
I hear and understand your feelings completely. I know this parenting thing is tough some days. Big Hugs
Connie

Julie said...

This is exactly what we are here for! You are in good company. Emma is down to only the occasional fit, but I have never in my life seen tantrums like the ones that Sam can throw! I am thankful (mind your sanity) that JillyBean feels comfortable with you to do this and knows you are still going to love her NO MATTER WHAT! That is what keeps me going on days like that - we are MOM, unconditionally and forever and they know that - what a gift. Now in the meantime, take some time for yourself if you can, even if it is walking in the backyard for a minute. Your plate is full and we are always here to listen.

Kelley said...

Never feel bad for blogging about your feelings...and of course we know that you love your little monkeys dearly, even when they are driving you bananas!! Hang in there...

Kayce said...

Girl! Don't you ever feel bad about venting your feelings! That's why we're all here, we're in this together, pre and post kidos! It's also nice to know things to prepare for when our turn comes. Hang in there! This too will pass.

PS - I became an organ donor when I renewed my license last week. :)

Bonnie'n'Clyde said...

Oh, I can well imagine. I think everyone has these moments, and I think that this sort of thing is going to be a particular challenge for me (having been an only child and used to having my way ;) So while I don't have experience, I can easily imagine the level of frustration. Hang in there. Venting is necessary.

Steffie B. said...

Oh my dear....I can totally relate....testing, tantrums, crying, banging my head against the wall, smoking some weed...JUST KIDDING ON THAT LAST ONE.....just wanted to make you laugh....Thing 1 is testing like crazy right now....parenting is the toughest job I think....your doing fine Queenie...you don't have to give up your reign quite yet! ;)

that girl said...

well hahaha, and I am here to tell you I have the SAME going on over here in my home with Catherine.

perhaps it's just spring in the air!!! may it end SOON!

that girl said...

well hahaha, and I am here to tell you I have the SAME going on over here in my home with Catherine.

perhaps it's just spring in the air!!! may it end SOON!

T & R McGrath said...

Kerri, you are not complaining!! That is what makes these blogs so wonderful that we can come someplace and share our feelings.

I know that you are a wondeful mom and will figure a way to make it through this and help her move pass the tantums.

She is defintely testing the limits! Owen has some wicked tanturms, I used to give in to them and hold him when I realized that I was saying it's o.k to do this, now when he does it I put him on his little couch and walk away from him. At least I know he can't get hurt and usually within seconds he is done. I am lucky for two things one, he stays on his couch and doesn't get off until he stops screaming and two, he hasn't done this in a public place.....YET! LOL

Good luck to you my friend and keep posting, we all love to hear from you!

Hugs
Tracy

~Amy~ said...

We all need to vent now and then...I just vented a little myself. You are a great momma and kids will go through their phases... Keep your head up friend! :)

Carol said...

I like to get it all out...now that said Emily is in her terrible 2's and I don't think I'm going to make it!! And hubby says I spoil her! Do you believe that??? Me spoil my sweet little angel.........no....no...hee hee

nikki said...

It feels good to vent once in awhile, doesn't it!? Sounds like you COULD use some time to yourself...too bad we don't live closer!
Take care of yourself, Queen...and we're always here for ya!

redmaryjanes said...

This will come and go. My children went through these phases too. They pass back and forth between their parents and there are times you feel so close to them and times you don't and long for them terribly. It will be ok.

secret agent said...

hey........trying to find your email address
nowhere to be found.
can you email moi please and give it to me when you have a moment?

xxx, M

Sam said...

It's not whining, sweetie. It's venting! Venting is healthy. Vent away!!!

Kieren is suddenly ignoring the word "no" and breaking down into HUGE sobbing fits if anyone challenges her reign as Empress.

My theory: children go through puberty twice. Once at around age three and again about 8-10 years later. This is God's idea of a joke. ha...ha...See I'm laughing - NOT!

Jonni, John & Sofia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jonni, John & Sofia said...

(Sorry I had to deltee the post above because I was typing too fast).

Kerri,

Don't you feel bad for complaining one bit. This is a place that we can all talk about our lives. We are going through some of the same drama right now. Sofia has been hitting me and her dad when she gets mad at something. I guess she is testing her limits. It is about to drive me up a wall though. Don't worry, Jilly bean is just going through a phase that all kiddos go through. Jillian will come through it just fine, hopefully she won't drive mama bannanas before then though (lol).

Hugs,
Jonni
:)

Lauren and Ed said...

Oh boy,have I had those days! Mia is SO strong willed and no mater how consistent I am, she just doesn't back down. Some days can be tougher than others, but take comfort in the fact they YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! Mia goes through these cycles of acting out evbery few months. She will be a holy terror for days, and then she is back to her sweet self...I guess I have always atrributed it to growing pains!